Because dating in your twenties is both exhausting and amphibian filled.
1. I’m 25, that’s halfway to 50 which is halfway to death. I am going to die alone.
2. I need a drink. And Taylor Swift.
3. How young is too young to join Match.com? I think it’s time.
4. I really need to start meeting people in real life. Where do people meet people?
5. Why aren’t my friends replying to my messages?
6. I might as well adopt a few cats.
7. I am allergic to cats.
8. Fuck I’m drunk.
9. When did my life become a plain-shoed parody of SATC?
10. Ben and Jen broke up!?!?! How am I supposed to believe in love now?! If Chris Pratt and Anna Faris break up I am done.